Shock | What can be done | Denial | How is denial stage expressed | What can be the effect | What helps
Shock
When a diagnosis has just been made, most often, both partners experience psychological shock. Shock is a reaction to information. At this moment, there is a loss of the basic and very important feeling – a sense of security.
What can be done
Learn more about diabetes, go to diabetes school or classes together.
Sit opposite each other, look into each other’s eyes and express (speak) those feelings that arose in this difficult situation:
- pain, sadness, fear – “I’m scared what will happen next”, “I’m sad that I am sick”, “I am very sorry that this happened!”;
- resentment, anger – “I hate diabetes!”, “Why me?”, “I hate that others can safely eat what they want, but I need to be careful of everything!”
Shock is a reaction to information, there is a loss of a sense of security.
Express bodily feelings:
- cry together if your shock comes with tears and pain;
- beat a pillow or punching bag if shock is manifested by aggression, anger, resentment.
Consult a psychologist specializing in diabetes problems. Sometimes the first shock feelings are so strong that they prevent them from taking simple steps to treatment.It will help you go from shock to a constructive attitude toward your disease and also support during this difficult period. You can look at diabetes from different angles: you can – at the end of life in general, but you can – at the end of the old life and the beginning of a new one, where you learn to talk and open up to your partner in a new way.
Denial
After shock, usually the stage of denial of the disease occurs. Denial of the disease is a normal stage for the human psyche. It is explained by the fact that a person is very worried about the fact of his illness. In this situation, the body starts unconscious psychological defense mechanisms. It protects a person from strong emotions and helps him survive them through denial.
How is denial stage expressed
A person does not want to think about the disease.
Not looking for information about treatment methods.
Outwardly, a person may look calm or a little worried. In fact, he experiences unconscious fear.
He does not believe in the severity of the disease. He laughs off, says, “I’m fine,” “I am healthy (a)”, continues to live as I did before the illness, without taking the necessary treatment or choosing “magic” treatment methods (herbs, teas, conspiracies, etc. )
What can be the effect
1. The patient does not make any efforts to get treatment – treatment does not occur
2. Relationships in a couple can become strained, because the close one begins to worry about the lack of proper treatment, assumes the role of a custody parent and responsibility for measurements, injections, and analyzes. The tension in the relationship is growing.
What helps
For a partner who is in denial, be patient. Do not “push”, do not “tyranny”, do not become the role of mom / dad. After some time, the denial will pass.
Just being around. Gently discuss the current state of affairs. Do not bypass this topic, but do not overwhelm them.
Express your feelings: “I am also worried with you”, “I am also scared”, “I am with you”, “Everything will be fine, we can handle it.”
The stage of denial is a natural protective reaction of the body, it will gradually pass.
Hugging more often. Eight hugs a day work wonders: makes you closer, give a signal to the body and the whole body that everything in the world is good, nourish you with a sense of happiness. And it’s easier for happy people: to be treated, work, love and live.
Patience is important: do not force treatment, do not push, be near, discuss the problem gently.
Consult a psychologist specializing in diabetes problems.